that's fad-tastik!

Spelled with a K no doubt! I'm all for jumping on the next, newest thing. I mean, I have a blog for fuck's sake! But if I see another dill-hole riding a fucking Schwinn wearing skimpy bicycle shorts and a stupid looking helmet, my car may start swerving accidentally.

It's disgusting. On the way to work every morning I'm assured to see at least one fat ass shuffling this way and that on a seat that's three sizes to small and shorts that wouldn't fit on one leg. Or shouldn't anyway, yet these fucking lemmings try it anyway.

Listen people: Floyd Landis is a doper. He's got more fucking testosterone running through his veins than Rosie O'Donnell. He tested POSITIVE for artificial testosterone, which we all know is a no-no. Lance Armstrong? He should be dead. God didn't want him in Heaven and the devil didn't want him taking over hell. He's not a hero...he's the unofficial antichrist. That's a call by the way...you dopes just wait and see.

Stop riding bikes. Stop taking up two-thirds of the goddamn lane. Stop dressing in those ricockulous outfits.

If you want to ride your bike, that's fine. I have one (even though I'm too lazy to actually use it). Just don't let the one bike race a year that you watch influence you to make a bigger, dumber ass of yourself than need be.